ANDREW DENTON: What are you going to do with the rest of your life?
MARK LATHAM: Well I'm very happy being a home dad and the arrangements we've got at home are fantastic so why change a winning formula?
ANDREW DENTON: When the boys are 16, 17, 18, when they're getting out of the house, what are you going to do?
MARK LATHAM: I'll be carrying their cricket bags...
[studio audience] LAUGHTER
MARK LATHAM: ...As they play for Australia and try and reclaim the Ashes.
Ah yes, sport and politics can be such a hilarious mix sometimes.
Here's an extract from the hansard from the House of Reps session in Canberra earlier this evening. By way of background, the Dramatis Personae of this vignette are as follows:
I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!
- Patrick Henry, Richmond (Virginia), 23 March 1775
John Howard at the presidential lectern in the White House with George W Bush. John Howard at the Pentagon with Donald Rumsfeld. John Howard being praised by Rupert Murdoch at a black tie dinner. John Howard with Tony Blair at 10 Downing Street. John Howard visiting Aussie blast victims in a London hospital. John Howard chatting with John Major in the member's pavillion at Lord's. John Howard with headphones and mike in the CCCP (Central Cricket Commentary Position) live to air on the Beeb.
You've got to hand it to John Winston Howard - when he's not blatantly lying about events he's doing his darndest to shift the blame onto others. I don't think I've seen anything for quite a while that encapsulates the John Howard mindset better than this exchange from last night's 7.30 Report on the ABC. It comes during an interview by Kerry O'Brien about the Government's announced changes to mandatory detention for asylum seekers:
Frustrated with the refusal of John Howard to cut and run into retirement? Try doing the following to relieve some of the election frustration:
1. Create a "new folder" on your computer.
2. Name it "John Howard".
3. Send it to the trash.
4. Empty the trash.
5. Your computer will ask "Do you really want to get rid of 'John Howard'?"
6. Answer calmly "Yes" and press the mouse button.
7. Repeat as required.
(Source: Crikey's subscriber newsletter.)
When the Australian Government introduced anti-spam laws earlier this year, an exemption was included for charities and political parties. I've yet to see any legalised spam from an Australian charity or political party. They'd be mad to do it, you'd think.
John Howard has an extensive archive of transcripts of interviews, press releases and other statements on his Prime Ministerial website, www.pm.gov.au. Considering his keen interest in international affairs, as evidenced with Iraq, I decided I would do a search of his website to see how often he has discussed the tragic situation in the Sudanese province of Darfur.
My search for "Darfur" on the PM's website came up with no matches. Searching Hansard on the Parlinfo website also drew a blank.
The crowning achievement of self-styled sports fanatic and Australian Prime Minister John Howard in 2003 came at the final of the Rugby World Cup in November. After the Wallabies lost an exhilarating game on an extra-time field goal, JH looked like he was going to burst into tears as he handed out the winners' medals to a seemingly endless line of England players and staff.
JH is a simple man of simple 1950s Sydneycentric values, so missing an AFL grand final because his daughter was getting married at the same time didn't trouble him that much. Though it did upset lots of Melbournites.
Melanie Howard married Rowan McDonald (no relation to Ronald, apparently) at the father of the bride's taxpayer-funded residence at Kirribilli House on Saturday afternoon, September 27. The ceremony started during the fourth quarter of Brisbane's drubbing of Collingwood.